damsel in distress

this scholarship application process was truly stressful and had put me in a state of distrain. >.< i guess the feelings that came were reflected by my previous frustrations when applying last year. and probably lack of self confidence to believe that i’m a competitive candidate. it’s all in the mind, it’s all in the mind…

of course, i really hope that i'd get it, it’ll take the burden off my parents’ heavy shoulders, and that’s my ultimate wish. so im grateful that Ms D talked some sense into me. throughout the application process though, i’m so grateful for the people who’ve supported me through it. ranging from ms li-sher’s instant reply with a testimonial at night, ms D’s testimonial for me within hours to Joey’s effort into sending SC certs into my hands; and not forgetting ms D's wise words and my last review. they’re small, but im just phew, mindblown by these people’s efficiencies. 

also for the support of nutélla, which seems fresh. i always seem to share things unwittingly during convos, which always takes myself by surprise too. i’m just that dumb, Shiela has always been right about this. and as i was reminded to say my prayers before i submitted my application, i prayed for peace and just God’s grace upon this application, though my chances seem to be the slimmest and im not trying to get my hopes up.

pfffsh, mindblown episode 2. as i was submitting the application, i was required to write a 150 words essay on telecommunications. okay, so i did it hastily, and tried to abide by the word limit. and then episode 3, it was a minimum of 150 words, max 300 words. ahhhhh, such a blockhead. it was harder to insert ideas then, cuz I had adjusted my brain to contain all ideas with the least amount of words possible, and it was hard for me to reach for those lost words. =.= in between, i sent a draft to my sister while the ‘caterpillars i ate for lunch’ were non-stop flapping their new wings in my belly. i called my ‘tech-savvy’ dad for a quick screenthrough, and to my surprise, le sissy said it was good - and it got me pretty excited, cuz it’s been a while.

dad said grammar was “amazingly perfect”. it’s entertaining how his enthusiam affects his accentuation with words. anyhow, it was all completed and gone were them butterflies, i felt like flying like a bird and rocking a shower concert. 10 minutes later, i received an email saying i had to complete a series of online assessments that are due in two days….

…..

anyway, i did them this morning in the computer lab, so it’s good and sealed for now. *fingers crossed*

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**today is my beloved kakak’s birthday. she’s like my second mother, my caretaker when mum’s away. she’s the best, and really, i really wanna give her the best too, if only i knew how. she always forgets her birthday, which aches me sometimes since im a bottle full of feelings. anyway, i pray that God grants her a lifetime of joy and happiness. that’s the least i could do. < 3